Suffering is Optional

#NoteToSelf 15.

Suffering: the worst of the unnecessary afflictions. A pain, hardship – a sentiment of unease and brokenness. Suffering, the scars that we carry within manifesting themselves as physical misery. When will they leave? How can they be healed?

I have endured suffering. I have experienced pain in ways, mental ways, that I thought I couldn’t bear. But I survived whatever period I thought I couldn’t manage to handle. I survived all the tearful nights. I conquered the emptiness and I have nursed my wounds. Because of my hands-on experiences with pain, emptiness, and the suffering that my mind has brought me, the dark places I have visited in my subconscious, and the way I managed to deal with whatever form of suffering I have had in my life, I can tell you the following:

No one can avoid pain, but we can ditch the suffering.

Why do we suffer? Is there really a reason to suffer? How can we ditch the suffering?

I don’t know why we suffer, but I know why I did. I suffered because I wanted things my way, and many ways I didn’t get things my way. I suffered because to me, once upon a time, my life was not fair. I suffered because I had many fantasies and ideas that I was hoping and anticipating to see become reality and never occurred. I suffered because the pain inflicted upon me seemed unbearable. I suffered because I didn’t know better. The only reason that it all seemed unbearable was because I was constantly resisting what was happening to me. My strong resistance against anything that wasn’t as I intended or wanted has led me time after time in suffering.

I remember making conscious attempts to evolve. I started reading more books, especially spiritual books. When I read “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, the concept of suffering got my attention. I read conceptually that we do not need to suffer. I also read that in “The Mastery of Love” by Don Miguel Ruiz. However, to know something conceptually is one thing, to live it experientially is another thing.

Now that I am living what I read previously, now that I am experiencing that which I knew conceptually, I can guarantee you that suffering has an expiry date. It’s up to your evolution and willingness how long you will continue to experience suffering as we know it. I haven’t suffered in a long time. I don’t plan to suffer again either.

To suffer or not has become a choice I am making every day. To stress or not. To panic or not. To resent or not. To resist Life happening or not. To linger in the past or not… I choose to not. I hope that you too (if you’re not there yet) will choose to not suffer anymore. I hope that you too will choose to not spend too much time worrying or resenting. I hope that you too will not spend too much time resisting. I hope that you too start embracing life by making the conscious decision to say NO to your mind whenever it wants to put you in the “suffer-corner”. I can. I did. I bet you can too.